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How to Teach Children About Cultural Awareness and Diversity by Christy Tirrell-Corbin, Ph.D.

9/12/2019

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Have you ever had an embarrassing moment where your child (maybe quite loudly) asked you about some characteristic of another person? For example, “Mommy, why does that woman look like that?” The typical parental reaction is to attempt to quiet the child and move on as quickly as possible. As adults we’ve been taught not to ask such questions (at least not out loud). In contrast, children are not yet conditioned to refrain from sharing what they think or asking what they want to know.
Earlier on than most people realize, children become aware of and intrigued by the difference in the way people look and behave. In fact, Phyllis A. Katz, while a professor at the University of Colorado, found babies as young as six-months of age stared significantly longer at photographs of adults who were of a different color than their parents. The research evidence clearly indicates that children notice differences in race, ability, family composition and a multitude of other factors. Their questions are attempts to make sense of those observations so they can make sense of their own world.
As a parent, I know that children tend to ask the most challenging questions at the most inconvenient times. Rather than trying to quiet your child (which implies there is something wrong with the other person or with asking questions) take these opportunities to help your child understand and respect differences and similarities among those in your community. Provide brief, objective responses to their questions. For example, if your child comments about the difference in a person’s skin color tell her, “His skin color is white because his biological parents had white skin.” If your child asks you why a person is in a wheelchair tell him, “There is a medical reason why she is unable to walk by herself, so she uses the wheelchair to get from one place to another.”
By helping your child understand and respect similarities and differences you will also help your child to understand who he is in the context of your race, ethnic group, culture, religion, language and familial history. In so doing, you will provide your child with personally meaningful information and also introduce concepts from anthropology, history, religion, geography, etc.
Use these tips to spark your children’s curiosity about who they (and others) are in their world:

1. I love you/我愛你/Te quiero.Teaching your children words in the native language(s) of your family is a personal way to introduce them to different cultures, as well as family history. What better words to start with than, “I love you”. Moreover, since many classrooms are becoming increasingly diverse, consider teaching your child key phrases, such as “thank you” in a language represented in her classroom, which not only models respect for diversity but could allow her to forge new friendships. There are an abundance of apps that translate and speak words in different languages that can support this effort.

2. Celebrating others.Children’s books are wonderful resources for helping your child develop a sense of his or her own identity, as well as an understanding of those who are different in terms of race, family composition, religious beliefs and ability. Visit your library for books such as: It’s Okay to be Different (diversity); The Skin You Live In(acceptance); Same, Same But Different (culture and geography); Whoever You Are(diversity); Where Does God Live (religion); What is God (religion); Over the Moon (adoption); Don’t Call Me Special (disabilities); My Brother Sammy(autism); and The Family Book (different family configurations).

3. Exposure to other cultures brings personal meaning.While children’s books open children’s eyes to differences, actual experiences have the most profound influence on what children think and believe. Here are more hands-on activities you can try:
  • Encourage cross-racial/ethnic/religious/ability friendships.
  • Expose your children to foods from different cultures, like classic pork and cabbage dumplings or kimchi.
  • Attend different events/festivals that celebrate a particular ethnic group, holiday or personal accomplishment, like the Special Olympics, the Chinese New Year or Holi, the Hindu festival of colors.
  • Whether big or small, children’s or history museums house an abundance of artifacts from different cultures and countries. Since museums can be overwhelming for young children it helps to talk with your child about what you will see, what she wants to learn and then focus on that part of the museum (especially if the museum is large).
  • Watch movies set in other cultures like My Neighbor Totoro, Kirikou and the Sorceress, and The Red Balloon.

4. The most powerful role model.While all of the activities listed above have been found to promote cultural awareness and respect, no activity is as powerful as the role model of a child’s parent(s). Children become culturally sensitive and respectful when they see adults who are culturally sensitive and respectful, and who take a stand against bias, racism or insensitivity. Lastly, it is important for adults to take a “strengths based” perspective when talking with children about those who are different from the child. This perspective focuses on the positive characteristics of a person and her abilities, what that person is able to do or does (as compared to what he cannot) and how differences make our world a better place.
By helping your child understand and respect similarities and differences, you will help him realize he is a wonderfully unique person among many other wonderfully unique people on this earth.
Proceeds from the sale of books purchased at Amazon.com help support PBS Parents. Thank you!

Author:
Christy Tirrell-Corbin, PhD is the Director of Early Childhood/Early Childhood Special Education at the University of Maryland where she teaches a course entitled, Culture and Community Perspectives: The Diverse World of the Child. Dr. Tirrell-Corbin’s research interests focus on family engagement, notably around teachers’ beliefs and practices around issues of race and culture. She also serves as a consultant for several educational organizations, including PBS Kids and National Geographic. Follow her on Twitter @TirrellCorbin.
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How to tackle tough drop-offs By Jessica Grose of the NY Times

9/5/2019

6 Comments

 

​It’s preschool week here at NYT Parenting. When I started looking into preschools for my older daughter, a lot of terms were thrown at me as if I knew what they meant (which I certainly did not). We have explainers for some of these early-childhood education buzzwords — Montessori, Reggio, Waldorf and “forest school” — so you can be less ignorant than I was.
Another shock to the system when I began the preschool process: the astronomical cost. So we partnered with YouGov to survey American parents on how the cost of preschool and day care is affecting their lives. We polled more than 1,000 parents and found that 20 percent reported going into debt to pay for preschool and day care — a sobering but unsurprising result.

We will send our younger gal off to school for the first time in a few weeks, and I’m bracing myself for another common issue during school transitions — rough drop-offs. I remember leaving her older sister at preschool for the first time and feeling smugly confident about the fact that she didn’t cry when we left. I recall thinking to myself, Look how well we prepared her for this experience! What excellent parents we are!
Turns out, she didn’t cry because she thought preschool was a one-time thing. On day two, when she realized that this would be her reality for the foreseeable future, she started wailing as we said our goodbyes. I can still hear the echoing, “Don’t leave, Mommy!!!” in the depths of my soul.
My daughter’s preschool teachers were extra helpful in easing those tough moments: they outlined very clearly that drop-off happened in the cubby area, outside the classroom, and helped parents disentangle from their little clingers swiftly but kindly. Amanda Marsden, a kindergarten teacher in Cape Elizabeth, Me., said that she’s always given parents the advice to just leave quickly if their kids are crying, but now that she’s a parent too, she empathizes with how difficult that can be. “Watching your baby cry is so, so hard to just walk away from,” she said.
I called Amanda to get her professional advice about how best to support your kids through their first weeks of school if drop-offs are hairy. Here are her tips.

Check the school’s drop-off policy, if it’s possible to do so before school starts. That way you can talk to your kids about what to expect at drop-off and prepare them. “It’s important to go through the process with them, so it’s not a total shock when you’re like, ‘O.K., bye!’” Marsden said.


Make the separation quick. Many schools won’t let parents over the threshold of the classroom, and for good reason: any further in, and it can become more challenging to separate, Marsden said. While it’s certainly painful to walk away while your child is still sobbing, they’ll typically stop crying within a few minutes after you leave (cliché, but true, Marsden said). Your kid will get into the rhythm of his school day and forget about you. “The routinization is comforting,” Marsden said.

Remember that school brings a new set of emotional expectations. One thing Marsden said that really resonated with me was that, for some kids, school is the first time they are expected to be “on” during the day. The demands are much different at school than they are at home, and on some level, children are performing just as we do in the adult world. This can be emotionally draining for them just as it is for us, and understanding this may help you reframe their experience.

Offer them something reminiscent of home. If your child is still struggling to adjust after a week or so, talk to her teacher about different tactics that might calm her, Marsden said. Giving her an object that reminds her of home might help, whether that’s a family photo, a stuffed animal or a small blanket that she can take to a quiet space when she feels homesick. When my older daughter was having a rough time during the first months of kindergarten, I gave her a fuzzy key chain and told her whenever she missed me, to rub it and know that I was thinking about her.

Stay positive. It’s hard for any parent to walk away from a sobbing kid. But you have to pretend like it’s not. “If you’re showing that it’s really hard for you, kids are incredibly intuitive and emotionally in check with what you’re giving out,” Marsden said, and they will pick up on your upset. That doesn’t mean you can’t have a good cry yourself after you walk away from them, but keep that smile plastered on during the separation.

By Jessica Grose of the NY Times
Published Aug. 20, 2019
Updated Aug. 22, 2019

​https://www.nytimes.com/2019/08/20/parenting/school-dropoffs.html
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